November? Already?

I can’t believe how much I want to share with you. I was looking through the photos I’ve uploaded from my camera and there are tons of photos of knitted projects, and pics of the boys…so much stuff I want to share and yet this blog has been sitting here empty. Barren.

I’m not happy about that. I think I tend to want to save a project to share with you once its complete…but that leaves the blog pretty boring in the interim. And then if I get busy and forget…well you guys get nothing new to read.

I’m not going to make a ton of promises…but I will try my best to post more often, and share what has been going on around here.

Guess what?  Maaike and I are going to Rhinebeck this weekend!  And we’re both squares!

In case anyone comes by to blog-stalk beforehand, I thought it would be nice to give you an updated photo of me and a little peek of what I’ll be wearing.  (Sounds so fashionable, no?  “And who are you wearing, dahling?”)

This is one of my more recent photos, taken at the end of August:

My face is slimmer now, and I’ll probably have my bangs clipped back, but the hair color, length, etc are all the same.

And assuming the weather cooperates, I will be wearing my (as yet unseen on this blog and not even in Ravelry yet) Audrey:

Sorry for the blurry pic…it was that or a flash white-out.

After the last 2 months…I’m looking forwards to getting away and meeting some fellow knitters.  See you in NY!

It’s Friday now, and there’s not much more to report.  I’m surprised that I’m not already starting to feel better, and I have to keep reminding myself that after each boy was born, I was in the hospital for 4 days and only came home in the afternoon of the 4th day, so now is only about the time I would have come home from the hospital.  And I would have a newborn to care for, to distract me and to take up all my attention.  Between the baby and the cooing and cuddling and nursing and diapers and the snatches of the second or two of sleep you can grab, no wonder I don’t remember much about the pain of the surgery itself after each child was born.

I’m sleeping a lot more than I had expected to.  The pain pills are tricky- I can take 1 or 2 every 4 hours; when I take 1 it barely numbs the edge of the pain, but if I take 2 it knocks me out within minutes.  I’m trying to eat enough to not get any side effects, but I still have to take 12-hr Gravol twice a day and I’m still having dizzy/nausea spells.

Wednesday night I was able to watch tv for the first time and caught up on some America’s Got Talent with Yannick.  One hour was enough for me, and it was back up to bed.  Yesterday hit me hard with 2 dizzy spells, and the only thing that makes them pass is to sleep it off, so that’s pretty much all I did.  I took off the bandages for the first time so I could shower, and had two surprises when first  a few spots started bleeding (scaring the crap out of me…but I think it was just a scab that got pulled off with the bandage) and then noticing that I had 18 STAPLES!  The nurses had told me I didn’t need anyone to come take staples out, like I’d had done on the 5th day post-babies, because I didn’t HAVE any staples.  They said it was all stitches, and it would be fine to wait until I see the surgeon for a follow-up next Thurs (10th day post-op).  Well huh- 18 shiny staples, all in a row.  Fun…

I leave you with this photo of Jakob from Sunday night.  Apparently he did the hair pomade thing himself.  🙂

Let’s face it- description of surgery is icky. To try and negate the ick factor of this post, I’m mixing it up with some recent photos of the boys, taken St-Jean Baptiste Day weekend.

Monday morning I had to be at the hospital for 6:45am to check in for the day surgery. The operation itself was booked for 7:45, the first of the day. I was all prepared to have only the right side hernia repaired, and to have to do this all again in a few months. My surgeon came to see me in the hallway as I was being wheeled into the OR, and gave me a quick examination (HELLO cool breeze and flashing the entire hallway!). He hemmed and hawed about doing only what he’d planned, or redoing the whole thing- it’s preferable to do only once side and let me recover before doing the other, but I was in so much pain on both sides that he told me he’d open the right side and see what he could see and decide once he was in.

They brought me into the OR and moved me from my bed to the table, strapped my arms down and then the anesthesiologist told me he was going to give me something to make me sleep. A few seconds later the edges of my vision got a bit blurry…and I never even noticed passing out. Unlike the movies, there was no mask over my face, no “count down”. Just a slow, soft, easy fading away.

I woke up in the recovery room. I remember feeling pain pretty quickly, but the nurses were really prompt and gave me something for the pain. I’m allergic to morphine, so they gave me fentanyl which works, but wears off sooner than morphine would. I think it took an hour or two before they wheeled me back to my bed’s slot in the day surgery ward. From that point on I would be allowed to leave as soon as I could go to the washroom. I was still in a lot of pain so they gave me a big shot of demerol with some gravol and I slept for a while longer. My mom came in to see me a few times, and I had my ipod with me but I couldn’t pay attention to the Cory Doctorow podcasts* I’d brought to listen to, because I kept drifting in and out.

I still had no clue what had been done to me. I couldn’t tell by feeling the bandages if my surgeon had done just one side or both, and the nurse couldn’t decipher his handwriting on the notes in my file. In the meantime they wanted me to go pee, but when the nurse moved away my blankets so I could prepare to stand, she saw I had a catheter in! Eventually everything that had to be moved was moved, and I stood up to prepare to walk to the washroom. I felt fine, and said so, and then all of a sudden nausea hit me so fast- I had no time to react. My throat felt tight, I felt flushed and hot and I had to sit down NOW. The nurse and my mom quickly got me back into bed though the relief at lying back down was tempered by the pain of moving that fast.

I was given an injection of something for the nausea even though I felt better immediately upon sitting down. They made me wait around an hour before trying to stand again, and in the interim the nurse managed to find my surgeon and bring him over so we could ask him our questions. I was a little out of it, but from what I could understand, he had opened the right side as planned, but was able to see right away that things were a mess inside and he could see the hernia on the left too, so he made the decision to completely open my 19-month-old c-section, fix both hernias, and redo the c-section. Had I been any older he never would have done it like that, but since I’m still young-ish, and pretty healthy, he decided it was worth the risk.

After that it was another hour or so before I could leave. A quick (ok, slow, shuffling) walk to the bathroom, some help putting on my clothes, and then it was back home into my own bed, where I’ve stayed for most of the last two days.  The living room couch just isn’t comfortable right now, and the one in the den is too deep for me to get in and out of yet, so I’ve been holed up in bed with a netbook my cousin lent me, a puzzle book my neighbor brought over, and my ipod.

Yesterday had a small setback where too much medicine + not enough food = nausea and vomiting, and let me tell you heaving to throw up when you’ve just had your belly cut open is NOT fun.  Luckily it passed quickly and now I’ve been careful to eat a little more and take gravol 30 minutes before my pain pills.

All in all, in essence I just had a c-section, so obviously there is going to be some pain.  Unlike the last 2 times, however, I don’t have a newborn to care for, and have been getting a lot of sleep, and a lot of rest.  My friends and family have been awesome, giving me more support than I need.

Now I think I’m going to try and stay up a little bit longer, and I just *might* pick up my needles…if I can find them before the pain meds kick in.

*awesome free sci-fi, btw.

**These gorgeous photos were taken by Avi of Red Button Photo, and the boys’ matching jackets were handmade (!) by Catherine of HairSprayMafia.

I wonder how many of you read this blog for the knitting stuff and skim the personal facts, and how many of you skim the knitting to see what’s been going on in our lives.

I’ve thought about posting so often lately, but I don’t because I don’t have the time to put up photos, and I wonder if you even care that there are no photos, if it means there will at least be a blog post.

I miss blogging, and I miss the interaction with those (few) of you who read me. And lately I’ve been torn between wanting to talk and share and get advice and vent, and keeping everything inside and keeping this an infrequent blog about knitting.

I’m still torn about the direction this is going to stick with, but I can’t stand sitting silent with the occasional “look- published pattern!” post. That’s not me, that’s not why I started blogging.

Knitting-
I’m currently working on another pattern for KnitPicks, as well as a pattern or two to self-publish. I have completed all but the cuffs of the Enchanted Forest cardigan, but am planning on undoing and redoing the sleeves, because the 80’s batwing look is SO NOT me. I’m 2/3 of the way through my current pair of traveling socks, knit with the Regia Canadian Colors Ontario colorway. I’m also 80% finished a pillow design that my sister-in-law requested oh, a year or two ago.

Family-
Yannick and I finished our first year of school! Our final exam was last Sunday, and after many marathon study sessions, we both found it easier than we’d expected. We still have a few little assignments to mail in, but the majority of the first year is complete and we now have a little break until year 2 (of 4) starts in January.

Jakob is the funniest little chatterbox I’ve ever met, and it’s scary how much attitude can come in such a small package. The other day I peeked in his room at 10:30pm, expecting him to be asleep ‘cus it was so quiet. He was holding the Cat in the Hat book and his Diego dome-light, looks up at me and says “What Mom? I’m just reading.” He’s moved up to the bigger (2nd oldest) class in daycare, and is in the middle of mostly-successful potty-training.

Henri is awesome, funny, sweet and really, really silly. He’s almost as big as Jakob and is stubborn as heck, but whereas Jakob is a Daddy’s Boy all the way, Henri lately seems to be more of a Mommy’s Boy and always wants me to be standing up holding and cuddling him, and I love it!

We’ve been going through more health issues with Henri, though. I swear, this poor kid can’t catch a break! Long-time readers will remember some of the issues we’ve been through in his short life so far- the tongue tie, the nursing, the food issues, possible allergies, his horrible eczema, the scary infection…it seems to never end. This has been the scariest so far, though. I’ll get into more detail another time, but to sum up, he has started walking funny, and the doctors aren’t sure why. We’ve done some tests, but are waiting to do others before any diagnosis is made.

And finally, my last bit of news is that I will be having surgery tomorrow. Both sides of my last c-section have herniated, and the doctor will be going in to fix the right side tomorrow. He’s not able to tell yet if it is an inguinal hernia or an incisional one, but I don’t think it would change anything, either way. As if this weren’t bad enough, the sciatic (sp?) nerve on my right leg has been on/off pinched or caught or something for the last few weeks, and the last few days have been more “on” than “off”, today especially, and I can’t take even Tylenol or Advil because of the surgery. So in a way I’m looking forwards to getting some pain killers not so much for the surgery, but to help my leg!

I can’t drive for 10 days, and can’t lift the boys for 6-8 weeks, so my mom and Yannick are going to be doing a lot around here over the next little while. We’re really lucky to have my mom and siblings here to help out while Yannick is at work with my dad, ‘cus otherwise he’d have to leave work early every day. I’m going to take some time off work and rest. I’ve got some mindless knitting, some dvds and an ipod full of sci-fi and knitting podcasts. I’m all set! Now if only I weren’t freaking out about being put under…