I know. I said it again, and I did it again. I promised I’d post more often, and I didn’t. I think I’ve averaged about 1 post/week.
But there are things going on here that I don’t blog about. I’m not one of those bloggers who post every detail from their lives. I don’t think anything is wrong with that however in my case I tend (in person anyways) to share too much and only think later “why did it take me 100 words to answer when I could have answered in 15?”. I didn’t want to have to keep editing my posts so a few weeks after Jakob was born I stopped describing the minutia of our daily lives and stuck to some basics, and, of course, my knitting. That means I haven’t always blogged about the little things that happen, or that are bothering me.
Lately there has been a lot going on.
I’m going to try to lay this out fast because it is already 1:30 am, I have another 2 hrs of work on the computer to do before I can go to bed, and I haven’t slept more than 3 hrs/night for the last 3 nights.
Here’s the deal:
-I’ve been dealing with the mastitis. I’ve felt fine since I was put on the antibiotics but my doc was concerned about a duct that refuses to unblock, so I’ve had to run to her office twice a week. I had to go to the hospital for an ultrasound (supposedly fine) and might need to go for draining when I get back.
-I’m leaving tomorrow morning for 2 weeks. My family is taking a cruise and I’m not bringing Jakob with. (But there are people staying at our houses- any would-be robbers take note). This has been a very difficult decision and one that wasn’t made lightly. Long story short his doctor advised against it as he is too young for the hepatitis vaccines and the ship doctors aren’t trained for babies, nor will there be baby-safe medicines on board. Plus if something happens we would be stuck out in the middle of the ocean.
-This decision has caused me a lot of stress, primarily because my son refused to take bottles. Refused. I was going to leave him to wean cold-turkey with my mother in law but had a very sudden change of heart Friday night and woke up Saturday morning determined to make him go cold turkey myself. Saturday he cried and slept and cried and slept and drank 1 bottle under much duress and after a lot of soothing at 6:30pm then slept all night. Sunday was mostly a repeat of Saturday. Monday he drank 2 bottles with minimal fighting. Today he drank 4. You need to pin his arms down (or he’ll push you away) and force the nipple into his mouth but if you’re quick it only takes 30 seconds and once the nipple is in his mouth he drinks. He’ll even hold the bottle on his own and gobble it down. It’s almost like he forgets that it is the source of his food so he refuses it completely until you stick it into his mouth, then he remembers and is ok. The bottle/no boob/will my son drink or dehydrate himself stress has only begun to lessen today.
-I have never been away from Jakob for more than 3 hourse (not counting sleeping over night). I don’t know how I will make it 2 weeks without him. I will try to hold it together, but am already missing him so terribly.
-I’ve had to take care of everything. Packing Jakob for my inlaws’, packing Yannick, packing me, writing/sending our holiday cards, wrapping gifts, making lists of Jakob’s schedule, doctor info, etc to send with him, making sure dry cleaning or shopping was done before Christmas and before the trip, printing our boarding passes, making sure we had our passports, etc… You name it, if it was necessary to be done for either of us, Jakob, our house or our trip, I took care of it.
All in all there have been a lot of balls in the air these last few weeks and I’ve been doing everything I could to juggle them without hurting myself. I know I will get a much-deserved chance to rest in the upcoming days and I will take advantage of it, even while my heart is here at home with my son.
I don’t want to make another promise that life won’t get in the way because let’s face it- that’s what life does best. But please excuse my absences and have a wonderful holiday season and a very happy New Year and I’ll see all of you (those I read and those who read me) in January.
Take care, everyone.